I've been told I giggle...
and while it has never been something I thought much about, I've come to realize this attribute has made an impact on others.
The school secretary where I used to teach would say, for her, it's what stuck out most about me...
because she'd never heard an adult giggle before!
God has also shown me how my smile can impact people in a positive way.
I've heard comments about how "big" I smile. The first time I met my husband, Robert, it was my "beautiful smile" he complimented. I remember the final year I taught in Eagle County. I was walking down the hall as another teacher was passing me in the opposite direction.
I was smiling.
She was not.
Begrudgingly she said, "At least you have a reason to smile."
I'm not sure what she was going through, but if she had known what I was going through at that time in my life, she would have realized I didn't have a reason to smile. My husband had left. Our family was scattered across the county. My children were hurting ... and so was I. The ground beneath me felt like sinking sand most days, and the future I had envisioned was blown away like a vapor.
But, each day I chose to smile.
It wasn't a fake smile - a mask I chose to cover up the pain. I've done that before. This was different. I chose to smile because no matter how devastated I was or how unsure, I knew God was with me. So, I smiled because of Him.
Giggles ... yes. Smiles ... yes. But, laughter ... real laughter ... that was something I didn't do for a very long time.
People could argue with me about that statement because, sure, I've been heard laughing quite often. But I didn't feel it. Do you know what I mean? It's an outward, appropriate response, but inside you're doing anything but laughing?
Even in laughter the heart may ache, and rejoicing may end in grief. Proverbs 14:13 (NIV)
I can't pinpoint a specific moment when this changed for me, I just know I began to notice my laughter in photograph after photograph (can I still use this word when everything is digital?). In the last few years, I've been captured laughing in photos--so often--it caused me to stop and reflect on what I was feeling. I was really laughing. It was easy and natural. I felt the laughter in the depths of my heart and soul.
How did this happen? Only the lover of my soul truly knows, but I think it's something like this: little by little, bit by bit, Jesus has dug away, and continues to dig away, all the hurt, pain, bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness, worry, anxiety, fear, and uncertainty to uncover the freedom, joy, and peace only found in Him. And in the process ... He's also uncovered my buried laughter.
Maybe you're wondering about the title of this post and why I've included a photo of a ceramic frog. He is my little reminder that our giggles, and our smiles, and our laughter are a precious treasure to God. So much so that He will go to great lengths to ensure He receives them--even put a ceramic frog in your pocket ...
My mom and I went to a LuLaRoe clothing party and had so much fun trying on different clothes and modeling them for each other. I left the party with two new dresses and one new top, all thanks to my mom! After washing one of the dresses and wearing it outside of the party for the first time, I discovered it had pockets ... one of my favorite features in any piece of clothing! As I stuck my hand inside, I felt something hard and pulled it out.
There in my hand was this tiny, ceramic frog with a little grin on his face.
I laughed out loud, and then said, "Thank You, God!" He wanted the gift of my laughter, He provided a way to receive it, and He sure did get it!
My little frog sits by my bathroom sink now. I smile every time I look at him or think of him. And I'm reminded of what a gift it is to laugh ... genuinely laugh ... and smile ... and giggle.
Your smiles, giggles, and laughter are a gift to yourself, to others, and a gift to God.
They're also a gift from God. He has given you a "frog in your pocket." Pray, and ask God to remind you of what that is--all the things, and places, and people who bring out the most smiles, giggles, and laughter. Then go surround yourself with them and feel the warmth of God's smile radiate over you.
Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy. Then it was said among the nations, "The Lord has done great things for them." Psalm 126:2