Darkness was my friend for a time.
Looking at myself in the dimmest light meant gazing upon my complexion without criticism.
Darkness was the best concealer, smoothing, blurring, diminishing, until a glimpse of the envied fantasy emerged.
Undressing apart from the light meant ignoring a changed body, marked by unsightly lines and dimpled places.
Darkness was the best distraction, hurrying me past the reminders of imperfection.
As much as the outward gravitated to the dark, the inward even more.
It was easier. No one saw. No one knew.
Except the Light.
It was the inner, hidden places to first receive attention.
One by one they were called from the shadows and illuminated.
Each had their time in the spotlight.
It was uncomfortable. I squirmed in embarrassment and writhed in shame.
Until the Light spoke.
There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1, NIV)
The Light didn't come to magnify ... to mock ... or point fingers.
It came to cleanse ...
Come now, let us settle the matter. Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. (Isaiah 1:18)
to forgive ...
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)
to invite ...
Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. (Hosea 2:14)
Once the Light was kindled in the inner man, no secrets remained, there was no need to hide.
Then the Light spoke to the outer man.
Show me your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet and your face is lovely. (Song of Songs 2:14b)
Darkness had concealed and distracted, but the Light wanted nothing to do with that.
Bare and vulnerable before the Light, I squirmed in embarrassment and writhed in shame.
Afraid of what I would see, my eyes refused to open.
The Light wanted nothing to do with that.
Let the king be enthralled by your beauty. (Psalm 45:11)
I dared to squint.
Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me. (Song of Songs 2:10)
Sheltered in the shadow of His wings, my eyes wide open, I saw the beauty He created.
I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. (Jeremiah 31:3)
I saw His beloved.
Adorned in the Light, I knew ...
Darkness was my counterfeit friend for a time.